*** Upper New Adult Spinoff Standalone to the USA Today Bestselling Novel, Under the Influence***
SYNOPSIS
“Shhhh, Cassandra, it’s our little secret.”
Secrets are stubborn things when they refuse to remain hidden. They tear through your soul, clawing and lashing until the pain becomes so unbearable, you’re left no choice but to silently scream your agony. No one hears you, of course. You smile on the outside and drift through life as though your mind is at peace, but all the while, you remain your own tortured prisoner. Sealed inside the darkened, soundproof room of your conscience, deafening cries echo as you plead for someone to unlock the door and release you from your nightmares. And eventually, when no one comes, you find ways to cope. To dull the suffering the only way you know how.
But what happens when you’ve become so numb, when everything around you has become so blurred, that you begin to lose focus on the saving grace standing directly in front of you? When you’ve anesthetized yourself to the point of losing consciousness, forced to watch as his once solid image fades away, lost to your reach in the haze as it smothers you?
What do you do then?
You fight. You heal. Then you bring him back.
Well, my name is Cassie Cooper, and it’s time.
No more secrets.
This is my story.
***WARNING - The subject matter of this novel centers around the psychological effects due to sexual abuse experienced during childhood. For this reason, as well as sexual situations, language, and adult themes, suggested reading age is 17+.***
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AMIE'S 5 STAR REVIEW
WOW such an emotional read - I have read LB before , I do admit I did not read Under The Influence YET - I had hoped to read it before this but life of a blogger.... Regardless her stories left a lasting impression , I recall them vividly and the amount of books I devour that is saying something !!
At times this story feels a mess to me BUT that is where the connection lies. You can really feel the emotions , the despair the confusion. There is no denying the reality of this story. Sadly people struggle with these issues daily. Not only that but there was a story within the story. You have the past of Cassie as a child haunting her and then the past of teenage Cassie coming back to confuse and shock. I really cannot say much more than be warned - it is not an easy read but so worth it. The 4 letters - wow they really shed some light , the epilogue and description of Cassie's stories - if you are not touched and moved I would be shocked.
Cassie and her best friend Spencer have a great childhood story. Best friends since Spencer was adopted and moved in across the street and now as young adults they are still living together experiencing life. At the end of high school they both suffered severe loss and Spencer was able to go on and do the college thing where Cassie fell into a hole and is still trying to climb out of it years later. Lots of drinking , nameless sex and bad choices. Right now in the present Spencer drags her to a class and there they meet 2 guys who are about to change their lives for the better though it will not be an easy ride. Spencer and Liam make their amazing connection right away , that is a WOW story !! Grady and Cassie have a bit of a longer road despite the initial ease of attraction and trust. Cassie has a big secret, one that nobody knows , we barely know the details and on top of everything she dealt with as a teen I cannot imagine knowing now how horrible her childhood was. The healing journey is amazing , with the help of an amazing therapist that some of you LB fans may know well , it is again heartbreaking but clearly very helpful.
After reading this I am hoping that I can set aside time to read the 2 stories by LB that I have yet to dig into. I am a fan and I recommend this to anyone who loves a heartfelt story full of reality and in the end happiness.
EXCERPT
“You’ve been watching my apartment?”
Grady’s mouth quirks and when my eyes fall directly to his perfect lips, the heat from before resurges between us. I swallow deeply as he slowly inches forward, the warmth of his body searing my skin as he hovers near me. Then those lips pass my own to land on the shell of my ear before he whispers, “My men watch your apartment.”
He chuckles and his heated breaths fan my ear, sending a wave of goosebumps rising along my skin. “For the first time in my career, I was forced to take myself off surveillance. Because while my main objective was to keep an eye on your surroundings, all I could focus on was beautiful, irresistible you. I couldn’t tear my eyes away from you, and because of that, my involvement was compromised.”
By this point, I’m no longer breathing, so as soon as he retracts his presence and is once again relaxing in his chair, a whoosh of air enters my lungs. After drawing a long breath in and releasing it, I do the only thing I can do.
I blink.
Grady chuckles.
I blink again.
Then I clear my throat and break my one-question rule, again. “Exactly how long have you been watching me?”
Grady leans forward, pressing his forearms on his thighs and lacing his hands so they dangle between his knees. Then he opens his mouth and completely blows my mind.
“I’ve been watching you long enough to know something broke you. Something you keep hidden, something that weighs on your soul. You pretend, but your eyes betray you. There’s pain hidden within them, but when you smile, really smile, the pain is gone and you’re you. Not the person you pretend to be. And like I said earlier, I find that very interesting. I want to know what makes you smile, how to make you smile, and how to keep that smile a permanent fixture on that gorgeous face of yours. And more importantly, I want to know why you feel unworthy of that smile, and how to fix that too.”
He gives me a crooked grin and shakes his head. “I guess what I’m saying, is I would very much like the chance to get to know you, if you’ll let me.”
I blink, then swallow. Because once again, there is nothing I can say that could ever match that.
He laughs silently, gorgeous smile on full display, then extends his hand. “Do you trust me?”
Trust. It’s another one of those small words that carries such profound meaning.
I trusted once.
And it was that trust that broke me.
I dared to trust a second time.
And the evil hands of Silas Kincaid slaughtered that.
I don’t know if I have it in me to trust a third time. I really don’t. Not with someone who makes me laugh, or someone who makes me feel things completely unprecedented. Someone who without a doubt carries the power to completely shatter me.
Right on cue, voices slither through my mind, screaming their protest. Their warnings.
Only Spencer deserves light and sunshine.
Not you, Cassandra. Never for you.
You will always be alone.
All alone.
As you deserve.
I look away to the empty chairs across the table.
The voices rejoice in their victory while the obvious fact in front of me slices another gash in my chest.
I’m all alone.
Grady’s voice is barely heard about their yelling. But soon, the soothing tenor enters my mind and stifles their screams. “Don’t get lost in that head of yours. I’m right here. Focus on me.”
I tear my gaze away from the chairs to find myself immersed in a beautiful sapphire stare, so earnest and sincere as his outreached hand remains, waiting for me to find the courage to take hold. My chin trembles and moisture coats my eyes. I swallow and allow his stare to fortify me as I attempt to will the voices away.
I’m so tired of pretending.
And maybe it’s the prolonged exhaustion, but as I root myself into those damn eyes, I find myself succumbing to their comfort.
I know I cannot fully grant his request.
Or can I?
As I search deep within myself, I find there’s just not enough courage left in my reserve.
But still, I want.
But you don’t deserve that. You never have.
I want.
But you can’t have.
God, do I want.
Inhaling deeply, I hold his gaze and after several heavy seconds, I finally release my breath. My arm reaches forward, and as his hand wraps around mine, I revel in its warmth. It travels through my body and its heat settles in my cheeks. I narrow my eyes, but decide in this moment, I will give him all I can give. “I want to trust you.”
Author Bio:
L.B. Simmons is a graduate of Texas A&M University and holds a degree in Biomedical Science. She has been a practicing Chemist for the last 11 years. She lives with her husband and three daughters in Texas and writes every chance she gets.
Amazon Author Page: http://www.amazon.com/L.B.-Simmons/e/B00B26XOTA/ref=sr_tc_2_0?qid=1423076274&sr=1-2-ent
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